After much preparation and backbreaking work on the part of my awesome landscaper, who we will call AL (Awesome Landscaper), and his crew, I have a lawn. Squeal!

We came in something called “under budget”. I had to look up the meaning of this term, but from what I gather it means I didn’t write a blank check and throw it into the wind (as usual).

Here’s the breakdown: The giant magic forest was removed and remaining trees trimmed; the bushes were cut in half, revealing that I had front windows; the sprinklers, which previously blew water into the air like Old Faithful, were repaired; sod was installed; mulch spread around trees; and the sprinkler system was programmed to drain the lake of all potable fluid for the next week during hours when the HOA spies will hopefully be asleep.

A couple of nights ago I found a frog outside. I even brought him in the house to show my husband, though he didn’t share my enthusiasm in the discovery. Hopefully all this extra water will bring my amphibious friend back to see me again.

Bowm-chica-bowm, here are the racy pics.

The strip tease.

Take it all off baby.  Big tree gone, bushes trimmed, and ready for the sod.

Oh that’s good.

I’m super excited about the sprinklers. I know we all have to do our part to conserve water and, yes, once the roots come in I will be sure to leave some for the fish, but give me some time to enjoy this. The hubby and I are watching the sprinklers like a TV show. My yard in LA was the size of your kitchen table and the sprinklers did as much as me spitting on the ground. Since my plants received more dog pee than water, I just made sure my pup was well hydrated. I found out the dirt there was not soil, but crushed granite. It was a very tiny, very expensive wasteland. The prospect of soil and water together is very exciting to me.